Australians Relate Deeply To This Super Culturally Accurate Tumblr Thread

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mattstaff
Oct 2, 2018 5:00 PM EDT

This is beautiful. A true modern Australian poet. 

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  • 01
    Text - devilrie australian gothic we all refer to the prime minister by their first name. we know them well, and they know us. all of us. there's a man on the street corner who never leaves. "just waiting for a mate," he says. you realise he is on every corner, of every street. -you are swooped by a magpie in the same place, at the same time, every single day. "it's swooping season!" says your neighbour. it has always been swooping season. - sometimes you hear a woman whispering late at night or
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  • 02
    Text - eatingcroutons - Someone offers you a meat pie. It burns your tongue. You have never asked what kind of meat is in a meat pie. - The Prime Minister walks into the ocean and is never seen again. They say he was a traitor, defecting to the enemy, whisked away by submarines. You build a swimming pool in his honour. - The grass is dead, or the grass is Long. You do not go into the grass when it is Long. - An old man judges you silently as you buy an avocado. You already knew you would never o
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  • 03
    Text - - Someone offers you a jam doughnut. It burns your tongue. - You check your calendar and your house number three times before you turn on the sprinklers. Your neighbour's face appears at their window. You wonder if you should check again. - It is time for the Maccas Run. Nobody knows what time it actually is, but you all sense it is right. The Designated stands up. - Whoever she is, whenever, wherever, whatever she is, she will always be right. fluffmugger - It's bin night. But which bin?
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  • 04
    Text - ileolai - There's a new prime minister, but it's the same prime minister. Now he's gone. There's a new prime minister. You change your smoke alarm battery. - You don't believe the stories about the creatures in the trees, but you take precautions. One day, you see an unwary traveller taking shelter from the blazing sun underneath a jacaranda. When you look back, he's gone. - The train is coming in five minutes. The train is coming in four minutes. The train is coming in five minutes. The
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